Abortion. I just heard your
sigh. If you're as private as I am then this post may make you uncomfortable
especially if what happened was a secret, which most times it’s always a
secret. Today i stand as a friend to help you expose the wound so you can receive
perfect healing from the lord, because I went through that trauma and I know
what it feels like.
For some, pregnancy came from the act of
fornication, some in marriage and others from rape. Whatever scenario, first
things first, God has a purpose for every child he puts here on this earth and
even if a child is unexpected they still should have the opportunity to live
and be taken care of by the parents, other relatives or by means of adoption. I
know you're thinking "did you really write this post to make me feel bad
about what I already know”. The truth is NO but it's important there are no
blurry lines on this and for those considering abortion that they
reconsider.
Christ doesn't desire abortion and even though
you may have done this once you confess and repent he remembers your sin no
more (1 John 1:9) you are free and your past has no hold over you. However for
many of us, the stigma is real. The pain is so fresh that it makes you sick.
You then begin to ask yourself questions, the devil plays with your emotions,
you harbor so much hate and dislike with the person who made you go through
such. Every time you see a baby you
imagine what he/she may have looked like. I want to break down the effects of
what has most likely been occurring with you and how you can be free. So here
it goes:
Guilt - You
constantly feel bad about what you did
Shame - You feel humiliated and regretful about the abortion and this makes you secretive about it because
you're afraid of what others will say or think
Self-hatred - You hate yourself and can't go beyond what you did. This can
be reflected in low self-esteem and self-destructive behavior.
Post-Traumatic Stress
Disorder - This is an anxiety
disorder that occurs after a traumatic event. What occurs are nightmares and
even flashbacks which bring back fear, guilt and can lead to isolation
Anger/Rage - You have outbursts over little things
Addictions (sex, drugs,
alcohol) - This has become an
outlet from the pain so you continue to practice it because it provides temporary
relief. Some of you may be practicing sex continuously in the hopes of getting
pregnant again and feeling awful when you keep seeing your period.
·
Depression &
suicide - This is where you feel so low and you look at
life through dark lenses. This can lead you to a place where you want to end
your life.
·
Spiritual attacks from
the spirit of death due to the open door - Now this is not for everyone, but where
abortion has occurred severally and there has not been repentance the doors are still
open. Abortion opens up doors that gives the spirit of death legal grounds to
torment the person.
·
Denial - Some of you are in denial all together and whenever reminded
of the abortion, block it out of your thoughts and act as though it never
occurred.
If some or all of the above
resonates with you, it's time to get whole and i want to help you. The first
thing i want you to understand is the depth of God's love for you. There is no
mistake you can ever make that will cause him to hate you and i want to
reference 1 John 1:9 again. It says “If we
confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse
us from all unrighteousness." You do not have to be bound to your past mistakes there is freedom in
Jesus Christ (John
8:36). What you did doesn't
define who you are, your identity is in Christ (Galatians 2:20 & 1 Peter 2:9) If you haven't repented, come to God with an
open heart and repent for what happened. Repentance is the act of turning away
from your sin and yielding yourself to God.
In addition to this some of
you may be running around like a Martha (Luke 10:38-42) and
have become so work based to make up to God for what happened. That stops
today. Your works doesn't make God approve of you he loves you regardless. The
bible says in Ephesians
2:8-9 " For by grace
you have been saved through faith, and that not of yourselves; it
is the gift of God not of works lest anyone should boast."
Below i want you to
see steps on recovery as it has also helped me;
Acknowledge
the wound -
This is where you have to come face to face with the wound and admit it still
hurts you. Its only when you do this will there be a cry for help. You don't
have to bleed in private anymore.
Speak
up - Where secrets thrive
darkness hides, its important that you expose what occurred whether to a
trusted friend, leader in Christ who can help you with deliverance if
necessary, or a counsellor.
Post
Abortion Support Groups -
There are groups that take women through therapy where they are able to express
their feelings and get help.
Prayer
& The Word Of God - As
you're being open and receiving wise counsel it's important that you are
connected to God. Pray about what's on your heart, cast your burdens to God and
stand on his word. You can do scripture studies on your new identity in Christ
or on forgiveness, overcoming pain, healing etc. The word of God is life so as
you meditate on it, it’s building you up and tearing down the lies of the
enemy.
Forgiving
yourself and other parties involved - As
you grieve you may pick a part of yourself and find you have developed strong
unforgiveness for parties involved. This could be those at the abortion clinic,
parents, ex-boyfriend,rapist, etc. Understanding that Christ has forgiven you
from all of your sins intentional and unintentional through what was done on
the cross should soften your heart to let go. Forgiveness frees you from
bitterness and opens your heart to receive from God. Its hard to have a heart
open to God when its laden with unforgiveness. Ask God to give you the
grace to forgive and let go, you can do this.
Worship - Worship postures your heart to
surrender. When you lift up the name of the lord your burdens will melt like
wax in his presence. Play worship music regularly and worship in song
constantly.
Before
i leave you with a set of scriptures, i want to say to you that are unmarried,
your abortion doesn't disqualify you from ever getting married and having
children. You will be a great wife and mother and the lord knows your future
children by name and he will open your womb and give children to you and your
one day husband.